I want to thank God for many things.
My mom is sick, very, very sick. Alas, she is so far away, or I should say, I am so far away. So, I thought I should call / email my old friends or cousins who are my age to go and visit my mom to "represent" me. Then she will get to feel as if I am visiting her, once in a while. I used to call her often but now she's far too advanced in her decline to be able to take my calls. She used to listen and put up with my gabbing but now she only breaks down into tears when she realizes who's the person on the other side of the line. My mom's faculties are deteriorating, disconnecting, malfunctioning, little by little, day by day. And most often she's asleep most of the day and awake most of the night. It has become increasingly difficult to connect with her on the phone.
Then out of the blue an old primary school classmate of mine emailed me saying she had a strong urge to visit my mom when she woke up that morning, and she did! I didn't even get to meet up with her in the short time I was there in our hometown when I was visiting my mom. She happened to know a cousin of mine and she asked for the directions to our house, for it's been a while since she went there last. She said my mom attempted to converse with her and she made moaning sounds.
I believe that was You, Lord. A pastor once said I would one day be praying such that, the thought would occur to me, and I don't even have to utter the prayer, it would come to pass. This is one of those things. The Lord is compassionate, loving and kind.
We'd been here almost a year now and God had been so gracious and faithful in providing for all our needs, caring for our well-being and safety and providing friends, here or online. I went through months of depression and came out of it, all by His mercy and grace.
I had a tacky interpersonal annoyance happening in my younger daughter's school and I prayed that God would work it out for me and take the problem away. I believe He has and is taking it away, for all time. God is good. He worked it out without me forcing things to happen. He is truly dependable and magnificent.
The winter here is almost over and we had been in good health, by and large. We weathered the cold without much trouble. I even stopped turning on the heaters in the living room in the past month. We only used the heaters in our bedroom. God is faithful and true. He helps us through our troubles.
The doctor's report on my younger daughter's condition has started to move things in favor of a real education for her. We've been playing "school" and playing "learning" for the past year. Hopefully, this time we start to do real school and learning. I had totally dissociated my houghts and sentiments towards the mentoring situation in her school and that had kept my sanity in, at least, the last few months. God is good. He is awesome and sometimes funny, too.
I can go on and on and soon it will be morning and I will be yawning throughout the day sitting next to her in her class. Meanwhile, the porridge I'm cooking for her breakfast tomorrow is done, and so, I close this blog, for now at least, to lie in my bed and catch some winks before the sun comes up for Monday morn. God is good, I have relaxed and unwinded a bit, while jotting my thoughts in here. Hmmm, I love this "place". And I love the company of my Lord. Thank you, Father.
My apologies for any typos, as I wrote this without my glasses, for which I am too lazy to hunt, as my eyelids are soon about to drop. It's past 2 a.m. here.
Dawn attack, dawn retreat. So many things can happen at dawn.
Dated 24th July 2009
We went for our doctor's appointment. It was actually a milestone for my younger daughter, and for me, again. It's because the appointment was for the Paediatrician here to examine and certify that she really has the learning disability called Global Dev'tal Delay. And when that's done, the "machine" for govt support on her education and health care starts rolling. We've been here 10 months already, almost. It took us that long to get the documents from Malaysia ready just so we can have this important appointment. What I was apprehensive about was that they will require more paper work from the Malaysian side and I would have been unhappy with that because we had already spent so much time, frustrated efforts, etc. on that side. So, the good news is, the "machine" has started rolling. This Paediatrician will write the letters to start the process. It doesn't really mean the end of work for me, it is just the beginning of the New Zealand phase of my continuing work on Joche. :-) Starting Monday, we are back to collecting more urine and blood samples for continued tests. This is the very reason I didn't like to go through this process - they will just poke my daughter with more needles and probes, etc., again. And I was right. :( I guess this is just the life for us. But then again, it is still a milestone for Joche and me. And I would say it was a good appointment because the doctor was professional and not critical about anything. He was helpful and it was a pleasant appointment.
Dated 10th May 2009
Well, it looked something like this:
My older daughter actually drew me a "portrait" of how she thought I may have looked like when I was 18 or 16. And she wrote a note something like I will always be young on the inside no matter how I grow old in years. And she gave it to me last week yet, thinking Mother's Day was last Sunday. And she also vacuumed the whole house, did the dishes, washed the laundry, cleaned my toilet floor and tidied up the whole house last Friday, for an advanced Mother's Day present, too! Hmmm, I wish Mother's Day was every day. har!har!
Thank you, my dotty!
She's the only one who really cares about occasions like this, the rest of my family don't even notice what day it is. I wouldn't either, if nobody greeted me. ;-) No big deal, really. I would rather be appreciated on a daily basis than just one day in a year, really. And no presents, pls. I have no room in my house to keep them. Notes are good, digital ones even better - easy to store, for memories! ;-)
Cheers everyone, and happy Mom's Day. Hug your moms everyday, OK?
photo from : http://oxleylearning.org/germandictionary/